Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
