I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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