I'm lost and stupid without you.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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