Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
