STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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