Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I wish my penis had an off switch
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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