is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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