You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
