Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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