a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
