Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
