It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
