Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
