Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
