I cannot find my penis.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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