I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
