Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Randomize
