I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
