Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
