I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
