You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Boobs speak an international language.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
