so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
