Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
