She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I enjoy the company of your penis
So apparently I’m into choking now
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