so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
