sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
