Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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