Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I'm jealous of your bromance
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
