ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Randomize
