Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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