How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
