White coat. Heels.
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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