you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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