Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just pee around me
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Randomize