Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize