no, he came in my armpit
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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