Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
