i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
