Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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