But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i wish my penis had a tongue
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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