yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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