this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
