oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Randomize
