spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
