But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
