they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
