is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You need a sexual gate keeper
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
