Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
