i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize