its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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